Little updates and little babbies!

So first off: happy Pumpkin Spice Latte season, everyone!

This is not a PSL. It’s actually a Toasted Graham Latte, but TGL will never catch on.

So, it’s time for some live updates, because why not?

First and foremost, I’ve been dealing with a lot of sad feels lately. Most of the time I don’t even know why I’m sad, I just am. Yes I am on medication for Depression, it’s just not doing it for me. I want to talk to my doctor but at the same time I don’t because I hate hospitals now. Which is funny because as I kid I was at them all the time and loved them. So I’ve just been dealing with my brain trying to kill me and my poor health.

Also, my apartment was having serious issues all Summer long, which pretty much made this the worse Summer ever. The stress was so bad it caused even more health related issues, mostly related to stress. But, thank goodness, they seem to be stomped out for the time being, till the next time it happens… but I don’t want to think about it and live in the now.

Speaking of the now: my baby sister recently welcomed a new edition to her family! She had another baby boy, who is just the cutest. I’ve decided not to share any more photos on-line because he’s not my baby to share.

So here’s a photo of a goat. My nephew is a lot cuter than this goat. A lot.

So, that’s been my Fall. A lot of feeling sad and getting over it, and babies. Babies everywhere.

 

Something that’s been gnawing away at me

This isn’t exactly the easiest blog to type out, but it is one that I feel I should do, I have bits and pieces of it written in my head, but I’m not sure I can easily put it all together, but I’ll try.

A few years ago in Namir Deiter, I did an arc called “That one Oktoberfest”, in it, a character named Isaac dressed – quite sloppily – in a dress and wig to find out if his ex’s ex still had an interest in that ex, who Isaac still had conflicting feelings for. At the time I had meant for it to be a light hearted nod at the Drag Queen art form, but in recent months it has come to my attention that the arc has a transphobic light. It was not my intention, but the trope of “men dressed as women deceiving other men into thinking they are ‘real’ women” and making fun of trans women (or anyone other than a cis woman wearing a dress being wrong) is hurtful.

First and foremost, that honestly wasn’t my intention- while Isaac dressing badly in drag was technically a gag, it wasn’t directed at anyone or group, I had meant it solely being a case of Isaac doing whatever he could to find out this information, even doing something he didn’t want to, and realizing that it wasn’t right by the end of it, or rather, him prying into Joy, his ex’s, lovelife was wrong, especially using the dress and booze as the method.

However, I  do see how the story plays into hurtful, very harmful stereotypes, and it was wrong of me to do. I, or anyone, should never make light or fun of anything a man or woman (or whatever
other gender) wants to wear- whether or not I think they “pulled if off” or not. There is nothing wrong with someone who identifies as a man wearing a dress- I wear pants all the time, who the Hell am I or anyone else to say anything? As long as you are not hurting yourself or others, keep on with whatever you love.

Now I want to say no one mentioned this to me as a direct response to the comic. But over time I see how these comics could hurt people in some way. Hopefully it wasn’t too huge of an offence and just left people thinking… less of me. Man, that’s a bad best case scenario. :(

I wish I could say, “Oh, I made this one mistake”, but I know I’ve done shit like this before. Like having the comic’s first main bisexual character be deceitful and unfaithful (and Joan kinda started out that way too…).

Wow, this turned so ranty and all over the place… why am I even writing all this? After all, no one contacted me or even mentioned these issues to me… well, I did. And in order to move forward and maybe get a little better as a person, I need to pony up and admit what a terrible person and bad writer I am. Even if just one person out there was hurt, offended or just had a bad taste in their mouth over the way I have ever written any of my non-cis characters, I am sorry. I know there’s a good chance they just left the comic in disappointment and will never see this, but I am sorry.

I hope I can move forward and not make too many of these hurtful mistakes again. No one should be a punchline based on their gender, pronoun preferences, sexuality or the like. It’s sloppy writing on my part… not that I now see myself as an awesome writer or cartoonist now, but hopefully I’ll learn a little more with each day.

I know everyone has a different opinion on this, and they have their rights to, and these are just mine. I just feel terrible about all this and wanted to at the very least apologize. I know it won’t fix things, but it’s all I can do. I know we all play into stereotypes one way or another, I’m sure I’ve done it many times with other stories, I fear it may happen again, just know I didn’t mean to hurt.

2015 Shinies from Pokemon X

So the rest of 2014 had a lot of good Pokemon moments… and some bad ones. But this post is about Shiny Pokemon… I haven’t exactly ran off on the ORAS bandwagon… I have the game and all, but thats for another post…

This post contains Pokemon that I did not show in my previous post about Shiny Pokemon, which can be found here.

Let’s begin!

Found in the Friend Safari.I was doing some hoard hunting for a shiny Zubat but found him instead (not that I’m complaining)…

I don’t know how many eggs I had to hatch for this little booger, but it was too many for only two IVs. ><

Made 10 boxes of eggs (I usually make 10 boxes at a time before going on a very long bike ride) and found two of these guys.  I started using him on a play through, but then decided against it.

The other shiny I got from the ten eggs. o_O Insane luck there.

From the friend safari.

From the friend safari.

Also from the friend safari, I do a lot of FS hunting as I bet you noticed. :)

From the friend safari named after the best dog ever. I used him competitively quite badly.

The second best Pokemon I ever bred.

Found in the friend safari.

This little girl took like 15-20 boxes of eggs to hatch. Too scared to evolve her though. ><

Found in the friend safari.

Found in the friend safari.

Found in the friend safari… took forever but worth it.

Found in the friend safari. She is my pimped out ride and partner in egg-hatching crime.

…after three generations and four male shiny Ralts, here she is… the best Pokemon I have ever breed. Pretty sure it took like 20 boxes.

My most recent find… just caught her today using the fishing method.

 

The next shiny Pokemon are ones that are foreign to this cart, but Pokemon I still caught or bred.

My very first shiny Pokemon (not counting the shiny Gyarados) ever. Bred way back in Pokemon Diamond. He has my love.

Hatched on Pokemon White, second shiny ever!

For a good long while I had two copies of Pokemon X, one physical and one on the 3ds. Both with completed play throughs. Then (literally) the other day I found out you can move physical copies save files to digital versions. And considering the physical copy was the one with all my hours, I decided to do that. I moved all the Pokemon on the digital copy’s save file (which was also named Isabel… not very creative, am I?) to Bank, including the copy’s two shiny Pokemon. This one was caught using the fishing method.

And this was the other shiny, also caught using the fishing method.

Stay tuned for another post with my ORAS shinys… eventually. Don’t know when as I don’t have too many but the ones I have do have awesome (or hilarious) stories behind them.

Life on no sleep and too much sleep.

This is decaf, this is not what I’m having right now.

Over the past three or so years I’ve started sleeping a lot more than I used to. When I’m sick I just sleep even more.

Then sometimes I don’t sleep at all. And I have no clue why.

I’m sure feeling like I have another cold/flu/make me feel like crap thing coming on isn’t helping, but I think the vivid nightmares that are just mundane enough not to seem like dreams to me -to the point where I think I have woken up, go about my day, but I’m still in the dream- are having a seriously bad effect. I can even go about my ritual of turning on a light, turning on the news and then turning on my computer in these dreams… the fact the electricity only works half of the time in these dreams should be a sign. But it never is.

At least the lights turn on at all. Three years or so ago they would not turn on and everything was sort of a shadow world version of itself, so glad those stopped.

I also have these terrible dreams that involve sleep paralysis, where I’m in this weird cycle of “getting out of bed” while in the dream, only to realize I didn’t actually get up, to repeat this only to find out I can’t move then start to panic. Fortunately I’ve gotten to the point with that nightmare where I can now convince myself to just stay in bed and just go back to sleep. No point whipping myself into a frenzy if I can’t even move.

I won’t go too much into my other nightmares, as just thinking about them makes me sad. As I mentioned before, my nightmares are usually in real/ boring-enough settings so I don’t realize it’s actually a dream, there have been times I’ve even dreamed about watching Homestarrunner cartoons or just browsing the internet. Then things go terrible.

I do get to have the occasional fantasy dream, where I have some kind of super powers, or at least can fly. Most of the time. If I can believe in myself enough to get myself both up in the air and staying up in the air.

Fortunately long falls in dreams don’t hurt, and are not as scary as a pile of corpses. Ugh.

Right now I am currently running on no sleep at all. I have no idea why. I might just try and not sleep at all… it’s going to be a long day. I’m just going to have some coffee and hope my blood pressure doesn’t do weird things to me.

And maybe write a blog post.

Anime LA 2015

So yeah, welcome to 2015… sorry for not being around, I spent May till pretty much November in a funk… still not over it, but it’s time to move forward. Being sad over lost time only makes more lost time.

So anyway, last weekend my hubby and myself made our way out to Anime California last Saturday (I didn’t feel up for going on Friday or Sunday). It was rainy and kinda gross, but the con itself was tons of fun! There was so.much.cool.cosplay. So much. And there were poor half nekkid young men and women despite the cold, cold rain. Bless them! XD

We saw Candy Bomber preform, and they were great! We saw them last year as well, I definitely hope this turns into a tradition.

This year they had a Mario Bros. theme. So cool!

We also saw a panel about joining Team Rocket, had to leave it a little early, but it was a great day. We also went through Artist Alley and dealers hall… didn’t find too much in either, but what we did find was awesome.

Also it rained, like a lot. It made the drive home very crazy. ><

Sorry this post is short, there wasn’t much to tell other than I had a great time and didn’t take enough pictures… I hope to get back into this whole blogging thing again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

EmoFest ’14

Just making a quick posting… sorry I haven’t been blogging too much lately, when things go really well I tend not to. When things get so bad I find it hard to get out of bed, I tend to make whiny posts, so I try not to post too often when I feel this way.

Long story short- having serious family issues, personal issues and being a crappy friend to some good people.

2014 Wonder Con “Report”

…but really, this is just the story about how some girl tried to take off with my breakfast Sandwich and the way she stood right in front of the pick up area despite the fact that there were two other people waiting on orders before her and were being courteous and giving the counter space for the next order. We paid 75 cents extra for that cheese, you best believe I would have fought her over it and the way I got so pissed, I had to give myself a time out in the car.

The con itself was ok. Honestly I have no standards when it comes to Wonder Con. At least the staff people were nice and not rude this time, that was a definably a nice plus. The traffic was a lot less bad than Friday- we tried going Friday as well, but after it taking an hour to go one block, only to find out there was no parking and we’d have to park out in the Disney lot, we just went home. Turned out to be a good thing, I didn’t bring my woman supplies, so it would have been a bad day out.

We ended up getting there an hour or two early for Sunday, we waiting in a line that they provided for a while… then we went and got the sand witch. If I had known that whole thing with the lady would have happened, I would have just flat out skipped breakfast, even though I was dizzy.

Honestly I’m not too sure what to say about the con itself, the original plan was to go to panels all day, but we ended up leaving early for Easter. I missed the Bee and Puppy cat panel, but family is better anyway.

So… mainly we walked around and shopped. Picked up free stuff because that’s the best stuff… I hung about the Nintendo booth again this year (favorite place to be) and we got a few small press comic books (which are best comic books). And I got a MineCraft Ocelot plush (for Halloween this year, I’m going to get 5 of them, a Steve paper head and a bathrobe and go as a Crazy MC cat lady (aka, how I play Minecraft).

I will say this… there was a lot of gritty zombie comic books over at small press, and not a lot of the kind of things I liked. There were some really nice illustrators there, but I wasn’t in the market for art books. Not being in tune to anything there really made me feel old. I usually have a lot more interest in the comic books, but this time I was meh. Sometimes I can leave a con and feel really motivated for my own comics. That didn’t happen this time.

Maybe it had to do with me not going into the art supply booth? Maybe it had something to do with being late with the Friday ND because spontaneous fun family events ended up happening on Thursday. Maybe I’m just an old fart who couldn’t draw well to being with and is only rotting with age?

I don’t know, but now I’m grumpy.

Getting my organization on

So it’s February and I’m barely now getting a day planner… I don’t really NEED one, as most everything is the same thing every week- but it makes me feel accomplished to check off lists that I’ve written, so why not.

 

It’s just a 5×8 binder that I decorated with felt donuts (I used an embroidery pattern from My Paper Crane, but I used it as a template for the felt instead). They didn’t come out as well as they could have, but I like them (and I can always get some of her official donut fabric to cover it with instead when I get tiered of looking at my hack job).

One of the perks of starting this crazy idea two months into the new year is that I was able to get a pre-made planner at a deep discount (it cost $2, but I didn’t like how it was set up, and I wanted to add papers, hence the binder). Even though it was supposed to have been a year long planner, it started last August and ends this July. So in the end it’s more or less a half year planner. I’ll have to figure out what to do about this next August. Maybe by then I’ll have a program that makes these pages automatically and all I’d need to do is hole punch and cut the pages.

…and heres the back. I had made two too many donuts, so they got glued to the back. I also have a little flap that holds that pen to the left… it’s hot glued in, so let’s see if it lasts more than a month!

…. kind of a silly post, I know. I hope you all enjoyed my crazy half-assed effort to get organized, or to at least sew little felt donuts.